Sipping My Way to Sanity
Cheers to all you mamas out there who just might be, “Sipping Your Way to Sanity.” Here’s to those who’ve had a killer day at work and came back to a tantrum. To those who’ve tried to leave their house an hour earlier but were busy wrangling the herd. To those who have wanted to basically stick their fingers in their ears, scream “LALALALALAAAAA” and pretend, for a mere moment in time, a blip in reality, that they never had children. This post, my fellow mamas, is for you…
Sipping My Way to Sanity
THERE IS LITTLE MEDINCINE that cures the insane to sane, the child shrieking shouts to child chill-outs, the husband headaches to husband halos. Little in the way of help for such abhorrent ailments. You can’t yell, can’t pray, can’t plead your way to the sanity Gods and Goddesses. When nothing else seems to work, and you feel defeated yet again, this simple solution might find you well: I’ve come to realize that you can most certainly, and should surely, start sipping your way to sanity. This is a skill in which I’ve become quite adept.
Sip, slurp, “Sure!”
Sip, slurp, “What?! No problem!”
Sip, slurp, “Spilt milk? Who cares!”
If I had a prescription pad it would read:
“One glass of wine per hour. Not to exceed one bottle per day.”
And, that would be my doctor’s handwriting. Barely legible, but kinda cute. (Side note: WordPress won’t allow me to keep my original and adorable font). An unnecessary point that I thought I’d share.
The problem with this is that we shouldn’t be drinking a bottle of wine per day. I wish that were an acceptable thing to do and that I wouldn’t be a shit teacher, colleague, and mom if I opted to imbibe daily in such a fashion. In fact, I wish that style was in fashion! I’d rock the shit out of it! Quick! Someone get Gucci into the wine making industry! I think this would make the winos of the world look more acceptable. Though, I think my face would get fat, my liver further damaged (four years of college plus about ten more because my mind never left that ‘university of booze’), and I’d most likely stop going to the gym (God bless Zumba classes and treadmills with TVs), and in turn gain an additional thigh, which Lord knows I most certainly can’t afford to gain. I sometimes pretend there is a parallel universe where all of the “no, you shouldn’t-s” are “yes, you should-s” and vice versa. Yes, I could see myself in a perfectly pretty place like that.
I had a crazy day at work last week. My students were fucking mental, and getting ready for multiple concerts makes my anxiety soar through the roof. You’d never know it by looking at me but I truly detest the weeks leading up to performances. The day itself? Totally cool as shit. Ugh. I came home and G-man was sick and in quite a mood, it was raining hard, again (note-to-self, this is what makes Oregon so beautiful so I should forgive Mother Nature…again), and I totally forgot to go to the store for food. What’s worse? I. Was out. Of wine! How could I have let this happen?! Someone upstairs must hate me today (rule of thumb for mothers: place blame elsewhere…always). So, instead of going to get food, I plopped my kiddo in the stroller, walked with the speed of light to the wine store next door (yes, next door- a blessing or curse in disguise… you decide) and voila! Bought myself a sultry and too expensive beautiful bottle of Pinot Noir. Oh, yes, I did. “Food? Pshhh… I’ll throw some things in a pan!” “Crying baby? Double ppshh! I’ll turn on the tube while I throw things in a pan.’ “Students and looming dark concert cloud following my sanity to hell? Triple pshhh! I’ll drink that shit away!” I confess, those are the days where I very well might have the entire bottle of wine. Plus, that shit spoils if you leave it overnight, right? (wink)
In reality, at the end of the day, all is forgiven. When my little man tells me, “Mommy, Ms. J (his nanny) doesn’t have eyeballs,” or “When I get older I’ll have a vagina then, okay?” or “Mommy, you need lemon for the hummus. You don’t know?” After he had gotten me all of the hummus ingredients without me reminding him, and I had actually forgotten the lemon. What a precious piece of pie. He’s my main squeeze, and it is he who is truly my best medicine.
The Oregon Coast Rocks!
Okay, since I’ve been wallowing in a sea of self-pity and reeling from the pain of being sick and now, having to work aaand be sick (as if parenting and illness paired together weren’t enough), I’ve decided to tell myself to “shut-up and get over my self-made pity party.” Really though, I’m pretty sure I woulda been almost okay by now if it weren’t for the fact that there is no ‘sickness’ in ‘parenting.’ Bless those who opted to have more than one… I’m both baffled and amazed by you. Secretly, I also think you’re masochists… even bigger masochists than us lone wolves for having one. Don’t worry, there’s Xanax for that… and a whole lotta wine. Okay, I digress. I was thinking about the one ray of sunshine that I’ve had in the past week and that was when my fam and I went to the Oregon coast to enjoy the beautiful Saturday. We saw elk crossing in the street, had our toes in the sand, walked in an adorably quaint seaside town (we were in Manzanita – read my last post), and enjoyed the serenity of the trees and beach grass surrounding us. There is no comparison to the Oregon Coast, as it has its own unique beauty. Totally different than Long Island beach towns where I grew up… of course, those are beautiful as well, just different. Anyway, that one highlight from the past week reminded me of a coast trip from this past summer. It’s amazing having awesome friends who share their amazing beach houses with you. G and I went with our friends Jessica & her adorable daughter Daphne. The backyard is flat and huge for the kiddos to roam and play t-ball, there’s trees and a large stream in the far back, a giant garden with a guest house and peace flags, mint, berries, and all kinds of amazing finds growing and ready to be picked. At the beach, when the tide goes out, this entire cave and large area with LOADS of sea creatures opens up for you to walk in and explore. It’s like magic! Airbnb or VRBO a place to stay if you ever have the pleasure of visiting one of these tiny towns and you’ll see it for yourself. Suh-weeeet…
I meant to create a post of this amazing weekend after I left the beach house and then kept on forgetting, and forgetting, and forgetting again. Hopefully, this lil’ flashback to summer days gets you excited for future beach days. For my fellow Portlanders, if we keep on having these amazing days we’ll be beachin’ it up all year! Although, we are gonna head to the mountain this weekend for some sledding & skiing if I’m not seeing double anymore when I stand-up. 😉 The glory of having the mountains and the coast equidistant from your home.
Cheers to a summer throwback… enjoy the pics! (Taken near Cannon Beach, OR)
Vegan Chicken Enchiladas & Jalapeño Margaritas!
Vegan Chicken Enchiladas & Jalapeño Margaritas! was shot at night on New Year’s Eve so the pics are poop. 🙁 However, I’ve been on my death bed with bronchitis and a cold/flu for almost a week now so it’s all I’ve got in the archives. I felt like crap-o-la at work on Friday, thought I was recovering on Saturday (went to Manzanita, OR – the coast – b/c it was beautiful that day) until my cough started up and bought me to the ER because urgent care was closed. Sigh… sickness blows. And, you know I’m sick when I don’t even want to eat food… that means I’m for reaaalllzzz sick.
Okay, back to the food. I tried packaged jackfruit that was pre-seasoned last year and I thought it was totally gross. However, many people have told me to make it myself and give it a second go, so, I did. I purchased it in a can at Trader Joe’s and seasoned it myself. Was awesome! NOTHING like the crap I had bought pre-packaged. Honestly, it reminded me of an artichoke. I made my own vegan cheese sauce, used red and green enchilada sauces (Christmas enchiladas), and, of course, had to make my famous spicy jalapeño margaritas to go with! Especially, since I was chef-ing this up for the new year! Bubbles during the EST & PST ball drops and margs the rest of the night. WOo-hOo!
Enjoy the recipes and my pics from Manzanita! I threw in one from our walk downtown on New Year’s Eve before the margs and enchiladas (G was super upset he couldn’t play in the fountain. 😉 Cheers to a MUCH warmer winter than last!
- 1 can Trader Joe's Jackfruit - sliced into thin strips
- 2 Tbl Trader Joe's Onion Salt
- 1 Tbl taco seasoning
- 3 cloves garlic - chopped
- 1 C onion -diced
- 1/2 C red enchilada sauce
- 1/4 C green enchilada sauce
- 3-4 C vegan cheese sauce (I used my own recipe - in recipe index on blog)
- 8 tortilla shells
- Oil for pan
- Salt to taste
- 10 limes - juiced
- 1 1/2 C tequila
- 1/2 C pickled jalapeño - sliced
- 4 oz orange juice
- 2 oz orange liquor of choice (Cointreau or Triple Sec)
- 2 Tbl agave or honey
- Pinch of salt
- Ice
- Preheat oven to 350f
- In a pan over medium heat, add onion in oil with a pinch of salt and cook for about 3 minutes
- Add garlic and cook for an additional minute
- Add jackfruit, onion salt, salt, taco seasoning, and stir occasionally for about 8-10 minutes or until slightly browned
- In a separate pan, spray with oil and layer the bottom with some enchilada sauce
- Evenly spread the jackfruit and cheese into each of the 8 tortillas
- Roll them up and place in pan
- Cover fully with the rest of the enchilada sauces and bake for approximately 15-20 minutes or until lightly crisped
- For the margaritas: (Make whilst the enchiladas are baking)
- Place all of the ingredients into a pitcher and mix well
- To serve, take a shaker with ice, pour mix over ice, and pour into individual margarita glasses - the jalapeños should be strained with the ice and therefore neither should enter the margarita glasses
- Margarita recipe makes about 6
- Enchilada recipe makes 8
Easy Cheesy Vegan Tofu Quesadillas
Easy Cheesy Vegan Tofu Quesadillas is another recipe I threw together during the Christmas holiday because (insert drum roll here)… my new and fabulous quesadilla maker entered my life! Santa loves me and knows me well. Once upon a time, when I was living in OR (the first time), on an old farm, 30 acres of glory: chicken coup, barn, bunk house, an old boat that someone had began making on the property, where we spent many a day drinking next to our horseshoe pit, amongst the apple, pear, nut, plum, and cherry trees, next to the grape and blackberry vines, wild mint everywhere and so much more… my hippie lovin’ roomies and I happened to purchase a quesadilla maker and we went nuts-o! Quesadilla everything! Brie and egg bfast quesadillas, veggie meat Mexican quesadillas, Italian, Greek, Thai… you name it. There was nothing we wouldn’t put in a quesadilla. The beauty of a quesadilla maker is that it seals the contents perfectly and creates beautifully even triangles so you look like a ‘profresh’ quesadilla chef galore. 😉 I implore you to buy one of these grand machines. They’re crazy cheap as well. Amazon that beotch up! It was a last minute decision to photograph these so I only have a few of the finished product. I didn’t really style them either but I still wanted to share this exciting new gift with you all, and to remind you that quesadillas are a great way to empty your fridge to support my “waste not” philosophy. Lastly, to encourage you to purchase a quesadilla maker if you have yet to own one. Happy quesadilla making! MWAH!
- 1/4 brick firm tofu - mashed
- 1 Tbl diced onion
- 1 clove garlic - diced
- 1 tsp nutritional yeast
- 1/4 tsp turmeric
- 1/2 tsp cumin
- Pinch of cayenne pepper
- 1 tsp oregano
- Salt & pepper to taste
- 2 Tbl tomatoes - diced
- 2 8-inch tortillas (I used Spinach)
- 1/4 C vegan cheese (I used my own recipe - in recipe index of my blog)
- Oil for pan
- *If using a quesadilla maker, heat now
- Heat a pan on medium and add oil
- Add onion and stir occasionally for 3 minutes (I pinch salt in as well)
- Add garlic and stir for another minute
- Add tofu and all spices/herbs/yeast and stir occasionally for approximately 5 minutes
- Remove from heat
- Put one tortilla in quesadilla maker or pan and evenly spread the tofu mixture and cheese on top
- Place the other tortilla on top and cook until both sides are browned
- Let cool for a few minutes, then cut into triangles, and serve
- Done!
- Feel free to add whatever else you'd like in the quesadilla and top with hot sauce!
Cheesy Vegan Tempeh Breakfast Sandwich
Cheesy Vegan Breakfast Tempeh Sandwich was created over the holiday to ease a carb-craving hangover! It totally hit the spot! Typically, I make my own vegan cheese but I used Daiya cheddar for this sandbo. I crisped up some tempeh in taco seasoning, Gimme Lean Sausage (super crispy – the way I like it), toasted the cheddar on an amazing jalapeño bread, and smashed it up with some avocado. I sprinkled some s & p over the two toasts, put it together, sliced it in half, and literally inhaled this fabulous concoction quicker than you can say, “Cheesy Vegan Tempeh Breakfast Sandwich.”
I was left stuffed and had become one with the couch, and then sipped on coffee, sat with my heating pad, and watched an episode of General Hospital. Hey, don’t judge. We all have our crack! This sandwich & GH are mine! 😉 I happened to indulge myself for the holidays with a bag of Stumptown’s Hair Bender coffee as well so that just made the crack even better! Not the worst way one can nurse a hangover!
I’m off to a healthier and more fit 2018 thus far. Four lbs down and more to go! Looking forward to wearing this AMAZING new jumpsuit and flare jeans that I just purchased from Free People. Hopefully, I’ll be rockin’ them & lookin’ svelte by spring! That being said, I’ll have to save this Cheesy Vegan Breakfast Tempeh Sandwich for a real craving. 😉 Happy almost end to the first week of 2018! Cheers!
PS- I’ve included pics of the awesome jumper & jeans!
Click HERE for a link to my other favorite tempeh recipe!
- 2 slices of bread (I used jalapeño)
- 1 slice of vegan cheddar (I used Daiya)
- 1/2 of an avocado - smashed
- 2 small circles of Gimme Lean sausage OR 2 other vegan sausage patties
- 3 thin slices of tempeh
- Taco seasoning to taste
- Salt & pepper to taste
- Oil for pan & tempeh
- Using one large pan or two small pans heat burner/s to medium
- Brush the tempeh slices with oil and taco seasoning - fully covering the tempeh with both
- Put the tempeh & the sausage in pan until crispy (you may cook the tempeh longer than the sausage) - about 5 minutes
- While the vegan 'meats' are cooking, toast the 2 slices of bread with a 1/2 piece of cheddar on each slice. When done, equally divide the avocado smash onto each slice with the cheese and smear together creating a beautiful gooey mess!
- Layer the sausage & tempeh on top of 1 slice of bread. Sprinkle s & p on both slices, close sandwich, cut in half, and scarf down!
Vegan Mushroom Lentil Wellington
Vegan Mushroom Lentil Wellington was the best decision EVER for my Christmas dinner. It was incredibly easy to make, loaded with flavor, healthy, and seemingly fancy-schmancy so my guests were uber impressed! Typically, I hear of mushroom Wellington as a vegan substitute for beef Wellington, however, with my love for lentils and wanting a more solid stuffing, I opted to add lentils as well. So glad I did! Was crazy tasty and enjoyed by all! This recipe will be a crowd pleaser for Thanksgiving dinners, Christmas dinners, Easter dinners etc. I’d really love your opinions on this if you make it so please share in the comment section!
Along with my Vegan Mushroom Lentil Wellington I made a carrot barley soup (usually I add mushrooms but didn’t want to overload on the shrooms), and mashed potatoes & gravy (extra gravy for the Wellington). We chowed it all down with a beautiful Simi cabernet sauvignon! For the mashed potatoes, I used Earth Balance ‘butter’, unsweetened almond milk, fresh rosemary, and salt & pepper. For the gravy, I used dijon mustard, Braggs Aminos (or soy sauce), veggie broth, flour, Earth Balance, thyme, and salt & pepper.
Christmas was extra amazing this year because it was the first year that G could really get into the xmas magic and spirit (movies, songs, presents), and because it was the first year that I have spent Christmas as a home owner! I am a lover of the art of decorating for all holidays… especially, Christmas and Halloween! It was awesome to listen to my favorite xmas tunes (classics and, hello, Mariah Carey!), drink Poinsettias, and decorate the new house with the fam. A pretty amazing month! Missing my grandma hardcore over the holidays but keeping her alive in spirit. 🙂 Now, it’s the new year and I’m crazy committed to my goals/resolutions for 2018! Read my previous Poinsettia post if you’d like to join me in ‘said’ resolutions! Lastly, I’m back to work today. Great to be back in a routine, but missing sleeping late, hangin’ with G, seeing my friends, shooting food, and exploring Portland! Sigh… maybe one day my dream of blogging/writing full time will come true. Until then, enjoy your return to the grind! XO -FGG
PS- Daytime photos of the Wellington are from the next day. For the full effect of the crispiness of the loaf, look at the nighttime pics. 🙂
- 18 oz cooked lentils (I used Trader Joe's Steamed Lentils)
- 3 C sliced baby portobellos
- 1 roll of phyllo dough/puff pastry
- 1/4 C unsweetened almond milk (or any unsweetened milk) for brushing dough
- 1/4 C olive oil for brushing dough & additional 2 Tbl for pan
- 1/4 of a yellow onion -diced
- 3 cloves of garlic - minced
- Salt & pepper to taste
- 1 tsp chopped fresh rosemary
- 1 tsp all purpose seasoning
- Optional: fresh rosemary sprig for garnish
- Gravy to taste
- Heat pan with oil and add onions cooking for approximately 4 minutes
- Add garlic - stirring occasionally for 1 minute more
- Add the mushrooms, salt & pepper - stir for approximately 5 minutes
- Add the lentils, all purpose seasoning, and rosemary, and stir for approximately 5 minutes more
- Heat the oven to 375f and remove the mushrooms & lentils from the heat
- Spray a baking sheet with oil and place a few sheets of pastry on the sheet to make a large enough surface area for your Wellington and brush with oil
- Top those sheets with 5-6 more layers - brushing each layer with oil prior to placing the next layer on top
- Add contents from pan (mushroom/lentil contents)
- Cover the mixture with an additional 5-6 layers brushing oil in between layers again
- For the top layer, do not oil (top), brush with almond milk
- Press sides together, adding more oil if needed and fold upwards -flip the Wellington over and place in the oven for approximately 35 minutes or until slightly browned
- Place a sprig of rosemary on top for a garnish
- Wait at least 5 minutes before slicing
- Serve with gravy
- Cabernet Sauvignon
Poinsettia Cocktail
Happy New Year! 2017 was an absolutely insane, bat shit crazy kinda year for me with lots of ups and downs. Mostly, it was pretty great! I’m hoping for an even better 2018 and can’t wait to start gettin’ all hardcore with my resolutions! More about that in a minute… For this New Year’s, I went the route of spicy margaritas (will be a future post for sure), however, to start the afternoon off on the right foot, I opted to make Poinsettia Cocktails, and of course styled them with some of my beautiful New Year decor! If you’ve never had these, they’re basically cranberry mimosas but stronger and better! Cheers to that!
Okay, so back to my resolutions. This year, I’m keepin’ it simple. I am looking for a greater sense of self awareness. I want my mind, body, and soul to be as healthy as possible so that I may be more authentic to my true self. I know, this almost sounds too cheesy/airy fairy for me to even write or say out loud, however, it is definitely what I mean. Time to get my bod back to where it was last year, hit the gym… HARD, practice yoga and meditation in the morn, if only for 20 minutes, cut calories and keep up with more plant-based cooking, and take time to focus on my cookbook, and my new book about my most favorite subject, G-dog. This will be a follow-up to, “One More Sip of Whine.” Regarding that book-o-la, I hope that 2018 is crazy kind to her and puts her out in the world with great success! Okay, so maybe that doesn’t sound so simple to you, but with the year I’ve had, that’s pretty simple to me! Wanna join me in my resolutions? I’d love the company!
I hope everyone had an amazing holiday! Back to work tomorrow, sigh… Two weeks off has been suh-weeeeet! Enjoy the New Year!
PS- Some pics from Christmas for your viewing pleasure as well 😉
- 1/3 C champagne OR sparkling wine
- 3 Tbl vodka
- 1/2 oz Cointreau OR Triple Sec
- 1/2 C cranberry juice
- Put all ingredients in a shaker with ice
- Shake well
- Pour in glass
- Done!
Spiked Vegan Peppermint Hot Chocolate!
Spiked Vegan Peppermint Hot Chocolate! is the only way I like my hot chocolate this winter. I can only have so much ‘regular’ hot chocolate before I get super sick of it. This drink has a twist of peppermint, and vanilla or whipped cream vodka to warm you up from the inside out. Not to mention, it’s done in less than 10 minutes! Perfect for a quick fix. 😉
In Portland, it’s been pretty cold. However, last year we were in the throws of some major snow storms at this time so I’m thankful that I’m not reliving that! It was fun for the first few days of fireplace, mimosas, snow forts, and sleds, and then it got too cold and old for my bones. After all, I left NY to escape NY winters! I’m hoping for a sprinkling of white flakes on Christmas day and that’s it. My snow quota is still super saturated from last year’s winter. Anyway, I LOVE my Spiked Vegan Peppermint Hot Chocolate! by the fireplace in my pj’s, with friends, or with a favorite holiday movie (A Christmas Story, anyone?). I’m ‘a gonna keep this post short ‘n’ sweet. Warm your soul, rouge those cheeks, and slowly slurp up this deliciousness. Happy holidays! Cheers! -FGG XO
- 1 C vanilla almond milk
- 1/2 C chocolate peppermint almond milk (I bought mine from Trader Joe's)
- 1.5 oz either vanilla vodka OR whipped cream vodka
- 1 Tbl unsweetened cocoa powder
- 2 tsp sugar (I used raw)
- Soy or coconut whipped cream for topping
- Optional: crushed up candy cane and small marshmallows for topping (TJ's marshmallows are vegetarian/vegan)
- Heat a small pot on medium and pour in both almond milks
- Once warm, stir in cocoa powder - mix well
- Stir in sugar - mix well
- After about 3 minutes (or until warm) turn off heat
- In a large mug, pour the shot of vodka (1.5 oz) and then top with contents in pot
- Top with whipped cream, candy cane, and marshmallow
- Done!
One More Sip of Whine
A holiday gift to yours truly was to get a move on with my book, “One More Sip of Whine.” It’s a book comprised of short stories about my adventure thus far, as a mother. It’s raw, real, honest, foul-mouthed, and I hope, hilarious. *Side note: As I write this, I am at a ‘child play land venue’ downtown Portland. Why do I love it? My child is amongst the other batshit crazy kiddos in what looks like a cage in a kiddie jungle, as I sit and type this with a glass of pinot grigio. Bless the man or woman who created this space. I think I’m in love with you… *Back to business: I’ve previously shared a few of my chapters (each short story is a chapter) with you all and thought that I’d share the beginning of the book: My introduction, and the shortest and very first chapter of my book, “Dear Abby.” I’m SO excited that my book has been through its beta readers and is now in the editing process! Do I realize the harsh reality of getting a book published? I think I do. I’m totally stoked about it anyway and am proud of myself for attempting to move in this direction!
I wrote another book about my experience as an expat in Beijing, China that I will self-publish when this current book is all said and done. It’s called, “Crazy China Sh#% (Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you God? I do).” This book was written to better explain to my friends and family what my life was truly like on a daily basis whilst living in such a foreign place. I’ve just started 2 new books as well. My first ever, to be self-published, e-cookbook AND a book that details Greyson’s life as a 3 year old, month-by-month. Writing is my therapy and a place that lets me escape and relax, a comfy pocket of my life to retreat to. That being said, I love cooking & eating food just as much, hence this blog! And, I did name it foodgalleygab… let us not forget the ‘gab’ portion of this space and place! I’d love to hear your opinions on my intro and first chapter, or opinions on any of the other 3 chapters that I’ve previously posted. Many thanks and I hope you enjoy this crazy book journey with me, as I’ll post the whole process as it happens. Happy Saturday!
“One More Sip of Whine”
Introduction
I NEVER THOUGHT I’D BE WRITING this book because no one could’ve ever prepared me for the absolute insane and yet, insanely wonderful ins and outs of motherhood. There are no words, however, I’ve tried to use many in this book to describe to you my experiences. Did I ever expect that a little person would be poking me in the vajajay and screaming “vagiiinnnaaa!” Or shouting like a madman “I’m crazy, mommy! I’m so many women!” Excuse me? No, I absolutely did not expect this to be my life. It’s a totally and completely, crazy and fucked up ride. I’m not going to preach to you about the latest studies in child rearing because I’m making my own up as I go. Unless, of course, the study states something that I’m already doing right, in that case, I win. Killin’ it as a mama. I have no idea why I thought when I became a mother I’d be in the elite five percent of motherhood. I’ve been knocked off that pedestal… hard. Those elite moms are often what I will refer to as the ‘mother shamers’ in this book. Also, it’s a code name for ‘not taking responsibility and feeling totally okay about my batshit crazy child rearing ways.’ I’ll get all real on ya at times and explain the seriousness of some of my struggles, but the rest? Well, that’s just a comical twist on the fact that bringing a kid into this world challenges every last sane and sleep deprived bone in your body. And, that sometimes, I think a glass of wine is the best medicine for almost all child related ailments (for you of course, not your child, I’m not that much of an asshole).
It’s the moments when your kid escapes the shower wearing his underwear on the top of his head while shouting “I’m so cute!” And, now you’re running late to a birthday party only to notice you failed to put mascara on both eyes after you’re miles away from home, but your new philosophy since becoming a mom has become “fuck it!” To virtually every facet of your life. Phew! Words to live by. When the word ‘sex’ is something you think you remember from your college years, and the word ‘poop’ is something you use in almost every sentence. When you think the world is over because your child might not be going to Princeton, when in fact, he has yet to begin preschool, and you’ve not figured out why all the mother shamers got on that shit while their kid was still in utero. Yes, it’s all of these beautiful moments that at the end of the day, make your life so totally weird and nuts but somehow, makes it the best life you’ve ever lived.
My lil’ man is the coolest little shit on the block. His name is Greyson and he rocks at life. He was born in Beijing, China because I was working there at the time and I think that makes him even more rad. He is bilingual and bad ass and I love him more than Brad Pitt. G is the reason my world spins so crooked but so right. My husband, bless his Scottish heart, deals with our shit daily and I think is entertained by our unpredictable ways. And this, folks, is my life.
DEAR ABBY
DEAR ABBY:
I’m a total mess! I’ve screwed up and this mistake can’t be taken back. I’m losing my shit and it all began with me getting stupid drunk in Shanghai on Valentine’s Day almost three years ago. I mean, I could barely see straight kinda drunk. Weeks later, I found out I had done it; I’d gone and gotten myself good and knocked up. Fast forwarding, I now have this little baby… fast forwarding some more, I now have this little toddler… and his dad, my husband. My boobs have never felt the same and I barely breast fed (which I cried about daily for 6 months and am pretty sure I’ve been added to the Motherhood of Shame list. You don’t believe me? I assure you, it’s real. It’s a secret, or really, not so secret society of mother ‘shamers’), I’m developing cellulite overnight, my baby hair is coming in at a rapid rate and I regularly look like Alfalfa, my husband tells me I’m sexy and I tell him to ‘shut up’ because we both know that’s a big fat lie, and I’ve ignored my friends for approximately two years now guaranteeing me little return in the friendship department. I love my child but I think I love my brandy and wine almost as much. I thought I was a tiger mom but now I think I may be the most underachieving mother and wife who’s ever lived; and guess what, I’m TOTALLY okay with that! What’s wrong with me?! Am I going to hell in a hand basket with an empty bottle of booze?! Surely, the Devil knows this is my worst fate, and I will, therefore, receive just that. What can I do to score some sweet points with the Mother Goddesses? I’m a good person, I swear! Wait, I don’t think I’m supposed to swear. See! I don’t even know the rules of this sick and twisted game they’re calling “motherhood.” Help me, Abby! Help!
-MOMMIE DEAREST
DEAR MOMMIE DEAREST:
Has it occurred to you that you may be affecting your husband’s self-confidence and possibly giving your child a litany of bad examples with your love affair of alcohol and general disregard for the people in your life? You say you’re a ‘good person’ but this may not be the side of yourself that you’re letting your child, husband, and friends see or get to know. I’m not advocating for ‘tiger mom’s’, however, I do not think accepting failure is the alternative you should take. Perhaps reflect on the impact of your actions to others and to yourself, and then slowly make positive changes like thanking your husband and spending quality time playing with your child; pick up the phone occasionally to check-in on your friends to maintain or rebuild your relationships.
*FOUND ON GOOGLE IMAGES FROM CAFE MOM
Sauteed Veggie & Farro Spiralized Zucchini Salad
Sauteed Veggie & Farro Spiralized Zucchini Salad totally made my mouth melt. I purchased Trader Joe’s 10 minute barley & 10 minute farro a couple of weeks ago and knew I’d eventually use the farro for a salad. If you’ve never had farro, you’re missin’ out! It’s an ancient wheat grain with a fabulously chewy texture. It’s an excellent source of protein, fiber, and nutrients like magnesium and iron, so eat up veg-heads and vegans! Or, of course, anyone wanting an awesomely healthy grain. 😉 I love my Paderno Spiralizer almost as much as I love my Vitamix, so that’s saying a lot! I spiralized my zucchini and then shaved my carrot with my spiralizer. I sauteed spinach, broccoli, and small white beans with some herbs and garlic powder. I had some farro that I had cooked with veggie broth (the BEST) and then put it all together in a bowl, tossed it with some Goddess dressing, and voila! A salad star was born. I was definitely left full and satisfied, as a good salad that is meant to be a meal should leave you feeling. When people tell me they don’t like salad or that it doesn’t “fill them up,” my response is that they’ve never gotten creative enough in the salad making department, and with a few ideas, they could eat a different salad everyday of the week that would totally satisfy them, fill them with nutrients, and load their mouths with deliciousness. I’d bet my Paderno on it! 😉
If you’ve been regularly following my blog-o-la, you’ll know that I’m not happy with my weight. I have gained a bunch since last year and miss my beautiful wardrobe. I moved from Beijing, China back to the US a year and a half ago and gave all of my clothes away before I left. Upon my return, I purchased a seriously dope, brand stinkin’ new, amazeballs, wardrobe that is just waiting to get back together with me, as I am, with it. I told myself that if I lost 5 lbs by this Sunday (almost there; gonna happen) I’d treat myself to a haircut and nail appointment. It’s been far too long since I pampered myself. Plus, I cut my hair the week after I moved to the US… I’ve occasionally trimmed it myself over my garbage bin at work only to have my students ask me why I have pieces of “hair” or “string” on my clothing. This has GOT to stop. Haha. Laziness at its finest! Not cool. 😉 Anyway, I mention this because I’m salads, everyday, at least once a day, yoga everyday, at least once a day for almost 2 weeks now and it feels great. I recommend this to anyone looking for health & happiness, or just to lose some holiday bloat. Plus, it’s delish! Inside and out. 😉 Happy salad week to all! XO
PS- This beautiful lil’ leaf is from my adorable kiddo who had come back from the park as I was about to shoot my food. He said, “Mom, this is for you! You can put it in your blog!” So, duh! I totally did! Thanks, G-man! XOXO
- 2 C spinach
- 1 carrot (spiralized or shredded)
- 1 zucchini (spiralized)
- 10 small broccoli florets
- 1/2 a 15oz can of small white beans
- 1 C cooked farro (I use TJ's 10 minute farro & cook with veggie broth)
- Oil for pan (I used extra virgin olive oil)
- Dressing of choice (I used Goddess)
- 1/2 Tbl garlic powder
- 1/2 tsp oregano
- 1/2 tsp basil
- Salt & pepper to taste
- Cook the farro on one burner, and heat medium sized pan on another burner on low-med with oil
- Put the broccoli, beans, salt & pepper in the pan and stir for about 3 minutes
- Add the spinach, oregano, basil, and garlic powder - stir for another 2 minutes (broccoli should be cooked but crunchy and still bright green)
- Divide all of the ingredients from the pan, divide the raw zucchini & carrot, and put into 2 bowls
- Toss with dressing
- Done!
- Pinot Grigio
Tahini Mushroom Dumplings
Tahini Mushroom Dumplings were inspired by my love for mushrooms, missing my favorite Beijing restaurant, Din Tai Fung, and what was left lurking in my refrigerator (waste not). Mushroom & veggie dumplings are my ultimate faves. Usually, I like them steamed, however, I was in the mood for some serious crispiness. I purchased some dumpling wraps last week and was itching to throw my shrooms in them! I decided Saturday was it, dumpling making day. So, I got out my mushrooms & wraps and then realized I had no idea what I was going to cook the mushrooms in. I ended up grabbing soy, dijon, white miso paste, and tahini. Holy sh#% balls! They were amazing! I stuffed 6 dumpling wraps, fried them, and served with a soy/Goddess dressing blend. Typically, my fave is soy & wasabi, OR soy and chili oil (ahhh… Din Tai Fung days…). I was crazy regretful that I had only opted to make 6! Who knew my kiddo would come over and go to town on them, too… which is why this also turned into a Greyson photoshoot. After all, he IS my most favorite subject. 😉 Hence the obscene amount of photos in this post.
I love sunny Oregon days. Especially when I have time to enjoy the outdoors and shoot some dope grub! Two for the win! Winter is coming. It’s frosty in the morning now. Last year, I missed 9 days of work due to snow days. Crazy! Portland wasn’t prepared for that kind of snow and did not have the resources to clean it up. Was insane! I cooked loads, drank loads of Pom juice mimosas, lit fire-after-fire, and played with my kiddo. Here’s to hoping for more snow days this year! I’ll make hundreds of dumplings! -FGG
- 10-12 mushrooms - diced (I used white mushrooms)
- 6 dumpling wraps
- 1 Tbl soy sauce
- 1/2 Tbl white miso paste
- 1 tsp tahini SAUCE (Trader Joe's make an awesome tahini sauce - different than their plain tahini)
- 1/2 tsp dijon mustard
- 1 tsp red pepper flakes
- 1 Tbl diced chives or green onions
- Oil for pan (I used 2 Tbl of sesame oil)
- Heat the pan on med and throw in all ingredients - mix well for about 3-5 minutes
- Remove from heat and let cool for 2 minutes
- Evenly distribute mushrooms over all six dumpling wraps
- To wrap, start at one end, fold and pinch, and continue this way (hint: use a little water on the wrap where you're pinching)
- Heat pan on medium high with oil (I used 2 Tbl sesame oil), add dumplings
- Turn dumplings as they crisp. Mine cooked for about 3 minutes total
- Serve with dipping sauce!
- My favorite dipping sauce is soy mixed with chili oil and a small flick of vinegar!
- Anchor Steam
Dear Santa Baby
Dear Santa Baby is a post of two letters that I’ve written to “Santa.” My mother always asks me what I want for Christmas via email and I always respond with a list, and then a fictitious letter to the jolly old dude. If you don’t want insight into my ‘interesting’ sense of humor, workings of my odd brain, if you’re easily offended, or don’t think life is funny and meant to be laughed at, stop reading now and just continue to follow my blog for the good eats. 😉 I mean, my true wishes? To be a blogger full time, to publish an amazing cookbook with a bonafide publisher. For my book, “One More Sip of Whine,” to hit the ground running and find an incredible publisher to work with, and, of course, to find a magic skinny and happy pill. One that puts me in both of those states permanently. Hehe… seriously though, those are my magical wishes.
My first Santa letter is the one that I’ve just written to my momma, and the second letter is one that I randomly just found from 2008! Enjoy, and I hope you still come back to my blog for more of me and my grub. Happy holidays friends and followers! MWAH! XO
Dear Santa Baby,
This year’s been a rough one, sir. New house, new three-nager, the ol’ ball n’ chain, and of course, the turds and turdettes that I teach daily. I know, I know, I can feel your tears for me now, and I knew you’d understand. This being said, I think I’ve been an extra good girl this year, as I’ve endured the wrath of ‘poverty’ (house poor), politics (Trump-o-la), and pain (I have a hus-child, ya know). What more can a girl go through before the good people of the Lotto decide that my good reward should come now, this very year, this very Christmas, and be GRANNNDDDD.
A few things: My closet and all of its glorious inhabitants have been suffering from a severe lack of vitamin D, as I’ve gotten fat and can’t wear those goods in the outdoor venue in which they are so deserving of. Also, I live in OR so naturally, my skin is suffering from the same lack of vitamin D. This all being said, I would like the following 2 things from you:
1- A magic skinny pill so that I can eat everything I want and still maintain the svelte figure of Giselle Bundchen. Thanks
2- A trip to Bora Bora for some well-needed sunshine, sanity, and surf
Loaded Tofu & Veggie Bagel!
Loaded Tofu & Veggie Bagel! has been in my dreams as of late. I’ve been craving a bagel sandbo, don’t know why, but knew it was gonna happen and be my next blog post… so here it is! I love everything bagels. Pretty sure that if you left me on an island with only 1 food option, I’d opt to survive on everything bagels. I’m a carb-a-holic (if you can’t tell by the everything in my blog)! I’m also a lover of crispy tofu, especially on a sandwich! Loaded Tofu & Veggie Bagel! is stacked with avocado, crispy tofu, cucumbers, carrots, sundried tomatoes, fresh basil, spinach, and smeared with Tofutti Cream Cheese and my sundried tomato & basil hummus (click for recipe). This bagel was bustin’ with goodness and flavor. I always feel extra great when people realize that something SO healthy can taste equally as delish!
Being that I live in Portland, OR, it is often rainy for parts of the day. I really wanted to have a picnic with my kiddo. Currently, he is obsessed with his new Radio Flyer mini-wagon, so we opted to pack the wagon with grub and picnic indoors! I ended up putting a blanket down with a vase of flowers and we ate to the tunes of Dizzy Gillespie (one of my kiddo’s faves… and mine). Love that my little G-dog is 3 and has been requesting “Gillespie” since he was 1! I did something right in this world! LOL. Anyway, picnic indoors, picnic outdoors, picnic by your lonesome or with friends or fam, picnic with your dog, picnic with a ‘lova’… just make sure you’re doin’ it with this super fabulous Loaded Tofu & Veggie Bagel! by your side. Happy days! MWAH! XO
- 1 everything bagel (or bagel of your choosing)
- 3 thin slices of firm or extra firm well-drained tofu
- 1 Tbl sundried tomatoes
- Small handful of spinach
- 2 basil leaves
- 4 thin slices of carrot
- 4 thin slices of cucumber
- 1/2 of an avocado - sliced
- 2 Tbl cream cheese (I used Tofutti)
- 2 Tbl sundried tomato hummus (or any hummus you have)
- Garlic powder to taste
- Onion powder to taste
- Salt & pepper to taste
- Heat a small pan on medium/high - high
- Add tofu - gently so not break and add a pinch of garlic powder, onion powder, salt & pepper
- Flip when crispy, about 3 minutes & add pinches of powders, salt & pepper again
- Cook until crispy, about 2 minutes
- Cut bagel and smear one side with hummus and the other side with cream cheese
- Top hummus half with avocado, and cream cheese half with sundried tomatoes
- Top on cream cheese half: basil, carrots, cucumber, tofu, and then spinach
- Place hummus half on top, cut, and devour!
- Feel free to replace any of the veggies or add more. Use what you've got in your fridge!
Mexican Style Tofu Scramble
Mexican Style Tofu Scramble is SOOO delicious! It has the perfect balance of spice, it’s loaded with protein, healthy, and easy to make! If food had moxie, this recipe would claim it. She don’t mess around, aight?! She’s fierce, fiery, and full of flavor… I’m actually eating my leftovers as I write this. Though sadly, I am not devouring it with my avocado toast this time. I made this Sunday morning because I was craving a scramble. It had been a while since I’d made one and I’d been staring the soy chorizo in its face for weeks now just waiting to taste it’s deliciousness. If you’ve never had soy chorizo, you’re missin’ out. It’s freakin’ amazing!
The weather was super crappy this weekend in Portland. I shot 4 recipes on Saturday and the natural light blew… hard. It was a clearer day on Sunday but still not sunny per se. However, it wasn’t raining (woo-hoo!) and I was craving some seriously delicious eats. Also, I knew we’d be going to the farm to get our Christmas tree etc later and wanted a solid belly. Aaannnd, because I knew I’d be walking around with a thermos of adult warmth. 😉 How else does one pick a Christmas tree?! The kiddo was pretty cute decorating that fabulously aromatic green giant later that evening but I definitely went through and reorganized everyone’s ornament hanging… sigh… the nature of a borderline ‘OCD-er.’
This Mexican Style Tofu Scramble is loaded with tofu, soy chorizo, spinach, mushrooms, spices, beans, olives, and more to ensure a flavor explosion – pinata style – in your mouth. The drool is real here. I just housed my leftovers and am already regretting not having made more. Although, I’m trying to stay away from ‘Mr. Gluttony.’ If you’ve been reading my previous posts, you’ll know that I’m attempting to ‘cleanse’ and shed some lbs, instead of packing more on for the holiday season. #thestruggleisreal. 😉 All that aside, this dish is dope, so get the fiery fiesta on in your mouth! Eat up and enjoy!
PS- Some pics of the tree decorating for shits and giggles 😉
PPS-And, sigh… when your child kindly attempts to sweep up the needles by himself because he’s Mr. Freakin’ Independent and makes an even bigger mess. Good thing he’s so stinkin’ cute! 😉
- 1/2 brick of tofu - drained & crumbled
- Large handful of baby spinach
- 1/2 C soy chorizo (I used a heaping 1/2 cup) (I used Trader Joe's Soy Chorizo)
- 1 C sliced mushrooms (I used white)
- 1 Tbl chopped garlic cloves
- 1/3 C chili style pinto beans (you can use regular pinto or black but it will change the flavor a bit)
- 1/4 C sliced black olives
- 1/4 C red onion -diced
- 1/2 Tbl of taco seasoning
- 2 Tbl fresh cilantro
- Salt to taste
- 1/2 an avocado for toast (optional)
- 2 Tbl Tofutti or a vegan cream cheese
- Oil or spray for pan
- Heat oil in pan
- Add onions and cook for 3-4 minutes stirring occasionally (I like the onions, garlic, and mushrooms to be browned a bit)
- Add the garlic and cook for an additional 2-3 minutes - stir enough so they don't burn
- Add the mushrooms and a pinch of salt and cook until browned - stir mixture enough so they brown but don't burn
- Add the tofu and seasoning - mix well and cook for about 2-3 minutes
- Add the chorizo & beans - stir well and cook for about 1-2 minutes
- Add the olives, spinach, and cilantro (I don't use anymore salt b/c I find the chorizo to be salty) Stir for an additional minute and then you're done!
- Optional: On 2 pieces of toast evenly spread and smash the avocado and cream cheese
- Feel free to throw in any kind of veggies you have in your fridge! I chose these 2 b/c that's what I had lying around. Waste not! 🙂
4 Amazing Soups for Wintery Warmth! (Vegan)
4 Amazing Soups for Wintery Warmth! (Vegan) is really a post for both autumn and winter alike. We’ve definitely entered soup season in Oregon, and I’m loving it! Soup with bread is one of my favorite meals. I feel like soups are a fabulous way to use the leftovers in your fridge, get loads of veggies in (especially for my wee man), and they’re quick and easy. Sold. In this post I have the following 4 soups (click on soup title for link to recipe): Creamy Tomato & Cauliflower (my FAVORITE), Pumpkin Coconut Curry, Creamy Broccoli, Lentil & Sauteed Mushroom.
I’ve been on a soup kick lately for two reasons: COLD WEATHER & my kiddo has sadly become anti-veggie. UGH! I get his vegs in by giving him pureed soups, smoothies, and pureed sauces. He used to eat raw tofu and virtually any veggie. So.Stinkin’.Frustrating. 🙁 Anyway, my soups are always crazy flavorful. I need my food to be loaded with flavor. I’m not a fan of blandness. I promise you that you’ll get loads of veg and protein from these awesome soups as well! Enjoy your fall & winter warmth with me and slurp these up with a dope homemade or rustic bread of sorts. Make Saturday your official soup day! Taco Tuesdays & soup Saturdays are my fave. ‘Til next time, peeps… 😉
Creamy Tomato & Cauliflower Soup
Pumpkin Coconut Curry Soup
Creamy Vegan Broccoli Soup
Vegan Party Platter
Vegan Party Platter… where to begin. I make one every time I have a party, a playgroup, or a gathering of any kind of vibe. Now, I have no idea why it’s never occurred to me that I should properly photograph these beauts! This fabulous spread deserves professional pics. Alas, crappy light = crappy pics, and my computer with Photoshop is currently outta commission. Sigh… Anyway, back to the Vegan Party Platter. It is incredibly easy, delicious, and healthy! I usually use what you see here and pending on my mood, may throw in a few other gems. I always serve a hummus, in this case a sun-dried tomato hummus, veggies, various dipping/spread worthy chips, tapenade or whole olives, roasted red peppers, nuts and dried fruit (in this pic, apricots), a small crock pot with a warm Mexican bean dip (not shown), and cheeses. Now that I’m vegan, I’ve been trying my hand at homemade cheese. The white one in this pic is Miyoko’s Double Chive… amazing! The one on the left is my very own. 🙂 Over the summer, my garden overflows with tomatoes and hot peppers so I usually serve a homemade salsa or pico de gallo right along side some delicious guacamole. I tried making my own tortilla chips this past summer but definitely didn’t enjoy them as much as some of the incredible store bought ones. Oh well!
For drinks, I always have 3 staples and a 4th that I decide pending on the season, and of course, my mood or the type of gathering being had. I always have a sangria (changing upon the season), a water with fresh sliced lemon and fresh sliced ginger, and a water with fresh mint and fresh sliced strawberries. The waters are uber refreshing and always a crowd pleaser!
Spicy Garlic Asian Noodles (Vegan)
Spicy Garlic Asian Noodles (Vegan) are one of my go-to meals for a few simple reasons: easiness, quickness, and deliciousness! They’re perfectly spicy, garlicky, and topped with 2 of my 3 most favorite veggies! Mushrooms & broccoli (spinach being the 3rd). I love leftovers as much as the next gal but I have had SO very many Thanksgiving leftovers that I’m ready to explode… seriously. I needed something easy and totally different than my T-day menu so I whipped up an oldie but a goodie: Spicy Garlic Asian Noodles (Vegan). Also, I’m a massive lover of all things noodles – Italian or Asian. I don’t discriminate. 😉
This slurp worthy dish is smothered in garlic, hot pepper, sesame, broccoli, and shrooms for your next noodle love affair. Noodle love affairs are some of my favorite love affairs. 😉 Although, I think my belly would disagree with the sheer volume of carbs I’ve consumed over the past week. It’s obscene and my wardrobe, once again, is suffering from a lack of vitamin D, as they’ve yet to see some outside sun because, well, the carb bloat this past week has been reeeaalll. Time for some serious yoga and Jillian Michael’s over the next month. Back to business so I can slurp up delicious noodles guilt free. Anyway, enough about my belly and more about this dish. It’s simple: It’s crazy delicious. Enjoy responsibly with yoga. Namaste, friends. MWAH! 😉
- 1 packet ramen or other Asian noodle
- 5 broccoli florets
- 1/4 cup mushrooms - sliced (I used white)
- 1 small chili pepper - finely sliced OR 1 Tbl hot sauce - like Sriracha sauce OR chili paste
- 1 Tbl roughly chopped cilantro
- 1 garlic clove - minced
- Sesame seeds for garnish (optional)
- 2 Tbl soy sauce OR Braggs Aminos (I use Braggs)
- 1 Tbl rice vinegar
- 2 tsp honey or agave
- 1 tsp sesame oil
- 1/4 tsp ginger powder
- Boil your water & start to cook noodles whilst chopping and mincing your herbs/veggies etc
- Heat a pan with sesame oil on medium
- Add garlic and stir for 1 minute
- Add mushrooms and soy and stir for 1 minute
- Add all other ingredients (including noodles) and stir for approximately 3-5 minutes more (broccoli should be cooked but still green and vibrant in color)
- Put in a bowl and garnish with sesame seeds
- Belgian style ale
Thanksgiving Nachos!
So, I have LOADS of leftover stuffing, meatloaf, Tofurkey Roast, mashed potatoes, and gravy. Like all y’all, I didn’t really want to go old school and make ‘garbage bin’ style sandbos with all of the leftovers – been there, done that. After wondering what else I could do with this smorgasbord of food, I had an “a-ha!” moment. Everything tastes super and insanely good when baked over tortilla chips. I added some nooch and some Daiya cheddar, heated the oven, and was left with an orgasmic, mouth melting, tongue drooling plate of Thanksgiving Nachos. Everything was vegan and gluten free with the exception of the Tofurkey, too! We pretty much killed it in the food department this year for T-day. Crazy amounts of good wine, good food, and superb people. I loved hosting my fam, going wine tasting, bowling, shopping, restaurant-ing, and garage-game-playing for the week they were here. I miss them already! Here’s to hoping for version 1.3 for 2018’s T-day!
Spicy Roasted Red Pepper Hummus
Spicy Roasted Red Pepper Hummus is super creamy and delish! Any appetizer that is done in 5 minutes or less is almost always a winner in my book. This is the hummus I am going to serve as an app for Thanksgiving. It has the perfect lil’ kick of heat and can be used as a spread, dip, or eaten by the spoonful. My kiddo couldn’t wait for the spoon and starting dipping his hand in the food processor. Note: Don’t shoot food around toddlers. It’s mental. However, it makes for some cute pics. 😉
I’ll keep this post short ‘n sweet. If you’re looking for something quick, easy, and cheap to concoct for a soiree or just yourself or your fam, this is an awesome recipe. I definitely suggest a hummus for a T-day appetizer as well. Hummus is always a crowd pleaser. I have an awesome recipe for an artichoke, basil, and balsamic hummus, too! Enjoy!
- 1/2 15 oz can cannellini beans - drained
- 1/2 15 oz can of garbanzo beans -drain and save 1/2 a shot glass of bean liquid for hummus
- 3/4 C roasted peppers (if using jarred peppers, drain well)
- 2 heaping Tbl tahini
- 2 Tbl spicy taco sauce/hatch sauce
- 1 tsp lemon juice
- 2 tsp lime juice
- 1 clove of garlic
- 1/4 tsp of salt (or to your taste)
- Place all the ingredients in a small food processor and blend well
- If too thick, slowly add water until you've reached your desired consistency
- I drizzled hot sauce on top and garnished with small slices of lemon and lime and a couple slices of roasted peppers.
Lentil Soup with Sauteed Mushrooms (Vegan)
Lentil Soup with Sauteed Mushrooms (Vegan) is now definitely making an appearance on Thanksgiving… though not on my original menu. If you are a lover of the lentil like myself, I have no doubt you’re a lover of lentil soups. This is a classic lentil soup recipe that I’ve topped with loads of sauteed mushrooms and fresh cilantro because that is what I had that lying around in the fridge. Waste not! My food philosophy that I am constantly touting “(like the mind, food is a terrible thing to waste).” Mushrooms are my ultimate fave as well, and I nominate autumn as the season of the shroom! I used white mushrooms, as they were in my fridge, however, you could use any mushroom in this soup.
Personally, I deem this soup to be simplicity in its finest form. It’s a small twist on a classic soup but it is delicious, healthy, easy, and displays itself beautifully, especially if you’re serving guests. It’ll make you look like a savvy chef for sure! Bust out the dusty apron and fool people into thinking you’ve been slaving all day! That is, unless, it’s Thanksgiving. In which case, you’ve undoubtedly been slaving all day. For T-day, I drink wine whilst cooking. This makes everything better. 😉 Naturally, some good tunes and food sampling (duh) will sweeten the deal, too.
Hope you enjoy and have a fabulous Thanksgiving with those around you. Gobble, gobble, gobble up! 😉
- 1 lb dry lentils (rinse first)
- 2 cups sliced mushrooms
- 1 carrot - diced
- 1 stalk of celery - diced
- 1 onion - finely chopped
- 3 cloves of garlic - finely chopped
- 1 cup cilantro
- 3 bay leaves
- 1/2 tsp cumin
- 8 cups veggie broth
- 3 Tbl olive oil
- Salt & pepper to taste
- Heat a large pot with olive oil
- Add the onion, carrot, and celery with a pinch of salt - stir occasionally
- Add the garlic for the last minute (about minute 7)
- Cook for approximately 8 minutes
- Add the lentils, broth, bay leaves, and cumin
- Cover pot and bring to a boil, then reduce heat to low (about 40 minutes)
- Meanwhile, heat a pan with oil and add the mushrooms with salt
- Add the cilantro in the last minute (about minute 9)
- Cook until lightly browned (about 10 minutes)
- When lentils are done, add salt & pepper to taste
- If too thick, slowly add more veggie broth until you reach your desired consistency
- Pour the soup into bowls and then top with the mushroom mix
- Done!
- Serve with a rustic bread
- Wine- Chianti OR Sangiovese
- Beer- Winter Ale
Vegan Pumpkin Mac n’ Cheese
Vegan Pumpkin Mac n’ Cheese is creamy, easy, delicious, and healthy. You’ll fool all non-vegans for sure! I brought this to a friend’s Thanksgiving this past weekend and almost everyone said, “you’d have no idea there wasn’t any cheese in here.” Just another carb to add to your Thanksgiving day menu! This is a vegan game changer… no doubt.
A couple of my sibs are flying in for my vegan T-day. We have gluten-free, vegetarian, and vegan amongst us. I am making this Vegan Pumpkin Mac n’ Cheese (with gluten-free pasta), a vegan meatloaf, Tofurkey roast, stuffing with ‘sausage’ (homemade of course), mashed potatoes, mushroom gravy, spinach salad with candied pecans, and an apple pie & pumpkin cheesecake for Thanksgiving. I’m serving a vegan spinach and artichoke dip, some sort of hummus, and a vegan sour cream & onion dip for appetizers. They’ll be LOADS of wine and bubbly throughout the day and well into the evening. If any of us make it up the stairs for bed I will die in utter amazement! I’m carbin’ everyone the ‘f’ up and steering us into booze-ville. If we end the night with garage games I’ll be pleasantly surprised; though I won’t be holding my breath.
I didn’t anticipate shooting this pasta so these are all of the pics I have. I brought this Vegan Pumpkin Mac n’ Cheese, fresh flowers and herbs from my garden, and a bottle of pomegranate mimosas with pom seeds to my friend’s house. She hosted an awesome soiree and it was SO great to see her, as I’ve not seen her since I moved back to OR last year. Thanks for the hospitality, Bethany! 🙂
- 16 oz pasta (I used cellentani)
- 1/3 cup raw and unsalted cashews
- 1 small butternut squash - steamed and de-shelled
- 3 Tbl nutritional yeast
- 1/2 a 15 oz can of pumpkin puree
- 1 tsp of thyme
- 1 veggie broth cube (I used the equivalent with Better Than Bouillon Vegetable Broth)
- 1 small onion - diced
- 2 cloves of garlic - diced
- Oil for pan
- Boil water for pasta and cook when ready
- Heat a pan and cook onions for 3 minutes
- Add the garlic and cook for an additional 2 minutes ( like mine slightly browned)
- In a high powered blender (I use my Vitamix) add the onion/garlic mix and all other ingredients other than the pasta
- Blend until smooth
- Poor contents of the blender over the drained pasta and mix well (add water if needed)
- Done!
- Amazing dish for Thanksgiving! Also, I LOVE a good hot sauce on any mac n' cheese. If we are sympatico, go nuts!
- White wine: Chardonnay
- Red wine: Barbera
Simple & Quick Vegan Breakfast Toasts with Sausage
Simple & Quick Vegan Breakfast Toasts with Sausage is healthy and delicious. Hummus, avocado, cream cheese, cilantro and sausage. I eat this any morning that I have all of the ingredients in my fridge. It’s done in 5 minutes, and because I won’t wake my tired ass up any earlier than I already do, this is the perfect remedy for fullness, healthfulness, and happiness. Not only that, my 3 year old will totally get down with this deliciousness as well. Fabulous start to both of our way-too-early mornings!
I obviously have a total love affair with food; hence this blog. Just because something wasn’t sweated over upon a stovetop or involved loads of hard work definitely does not mean that it wasn’t healthy and delish. I’m posting this because it’s something I eat often and I love to eat. It’s easy, super fast, and crazy healthy. Something to be said for simplicity, folks. I promise to keep those KISS meals in my blog!
For this, I used Trader Joe’s Tuscan Pumpernickel Bread because it’s insanely delicious. I toasted that and then smeared Tofutti Cream Cheese on it. Over that I smashed some avocado, and then topped it with a roasted red pepper hummus (recipe coming soon). I had cilantro laying around so I threw some on top. Cilantro on almost anything, really. I used TJ’s Italian Sausage-Less Sausages and chopped that up on the side. I had some incredible espresso and made that in my Bialetti. Voila! A breakfast star was born. What are my fellow vegan/veg-head friends putting on their morning toasts? Send pics in my comment section!
Beet Hummus with Mint
Beet Hummus with Mint is something I’ve wanted to make for a while now, as it seems to be the ‘hip’ hummus these days. Garlic is out, anything off ‘beat’ (haha) is in. Ignore my humor. 😉 I made this recipe a few times in order to reach the perfect balance of ingredients. I didn’t want it to be too sweet or too earthy. This awesome Beet Hummus with Mint is my final and ‘perfect’ dip. If someone would’ve told me that beet hummus would be a thing years ago I would’ve said, “gross, we’ve gone too far.” Thankfully, I’m with the progressive crew these days… rollin’ with the homies. 😉
I blended mint and beets and then garnished with fresh pomegranate seeds since I had half of a pomegranate left over from my kiddo’s birthday party (for my fall sangria – yum!).
Beet Hummus with Mint is an awesome appetizer for a soiree! It’s totally gorgeous, unique, delicious, easy, and healthy. What more could you ask for?! Let me know your thoughts and send me pics in the comment section of your creations!
- 1/2 can garbanzo beans (save a shot glass worth of bean juice) - drained
- 1/2 can cannellini beans (the beans should total 15 ounces together) - drained
- 2 Tbl tahini sauce (not heaping)
- 5-7 drops edible lemon essential oil OR lemon juice (if using fresh lemon, squeeze one large slice)
- 5 mint leaves
- 1 8.5 oz can of beets -drained OR 1 small beet
- 1/2 tsp agave syrup (or syrup of your choice)
- Dash of salt
- *Oil, mint leaves, pepper, and pomegranate seeds for garnish
- Blend all ingredients (except garnish) in a blender or immersion blender
- Garnish with oil, mint leaves, pepper, and pomegranate seeds
- Serve with veggies or chips of your choosing!
12 Mexican Inspired Munchies & Meals – Vegetarian & Vegan!
12 Mexican Inspired Munchies & Meals – Vegetarian & Vegan! Has been a post I’ve been meaning to make for ages. Glad I waited since I’ve created a few more faves since then. Honestly, I don’t know one single person who dislikes, scratch that, doesn’t absolutely LOVE Mexican inspired food! It’s an amazing cuisine for veg-heads and vegans alike. If you’re a carb whore like myself, and this food is not your jam, I sit here, flabbergasted. If you are in fact of my ilk, then you’ll love these meals by washing them down with a serious margarita or beer. The first is usually preferred, as beer can put my guaranteed-to-be-stuffed belly over the top in fullness.
I thought about waiting to post this for Cinco de Mayo but now is a perfect time with the cold coming in. Time to stay at home, have friends over, cook, drink, and eat! Pretty sure this is what I live for (besides my fabulous wee man of course). Click on the recipe name below the pic for the recipe. Let me know your faves in the comment section! 🙂
Recipes in order of pictures:
Crazy Creamy Mexican Pasta, Holy Sh#% Loaded Nachos!, Lentil & Tofu Breakfast Quesadillas, Amazing Classic Guacamole, Buffalo Cauliflower Bowl, The BEST vegan nacho cheese sauce ever!, Vegetarian Chicken Street Tacos, G’s Arugula White Bean Quesadilla, Mexican Vegan Sushi Rolls, Green Goddess Cheesy Quesadilla, Easy Spinach & Mushroom Cheesy Quesadillas, Vegan & Vegetarian Huevos Rancheros
*Recipes from the archives and many of them on Foodgawker & Food52!
Creamy & Cheesy Pasta Bake (Vegan)
Creamy & Cheesy Pasta Bake (Vegan) is crazy delicious and easy! Yesterday, I was by myself for about 2 hours, a total rarity in life, and decided to take advantage of this randomly awesome moment and shoot some amazing eats! I drank red wine and danced around the kitchen listening to Billie Holiday. I truly did this. And, it felt sublimely amazing. “You Go to My Head” is one of my all time favorite tunes. I put it on repeat. 😉 I need more of these moments in life for sure! Not to say I don’t love my little guy to the freakin’ moon, but mama needs a break sometimes, too. Some me time. So, yesterday was suh-weet!
This recipe uses an arrabiata sauce (homemade recipe coming soon), and creamy vegan cheese sauce. You can buy a creamy vegan cheese OR you can make it yourself. If you’re looking for a recipe, I used mine from my Creamy Vegan Mac n’ Cheese recipe. I used Lisanatti Almond Mozzarella Cheese and shredded it for the top of the pasta bake. This is a simple but incredibly flavorful recipe!
Side Note: Upon reheating, I put the pasta in a sauce pan on medium, added a Tbl of Tofutti Cream Cheese, dash of garlic powder, flick of the wrist of olive oil, and crisped that baby up! A pasta that actually tasted just as good, if not better, reheated! One for the win! Mangia, my friends. 😉
- 1 lb whole wheat spaghetti
- Approximately 24 oz arrabiata sauce (can sub out for marinara) - a garlicky option is best
- Approximately 24 oz creamy vegan cheese (I used my recipe from my vegan mac n' cheese)
- Approximately 1 C shredded vegan mozzarella (I used Lisanatti)
- Fresh basil to taste (chopped) and for garnish
- Boil pasta and preheat oven to 350f
- On the bottom of an oven safe pan, smear both sauces and add spaghetti
- Top spaghetti with both sauces
- Continue this pattern until pasta has run out
- Top the pasta with more sauce, shredded vegan mozzarella, and fresh chopped basil
- Cover pasta with aluminum foil for 25 minutes. Remove foil for the last 5 minutes
- Enjoy!
- Sangiovese
In the Garden with Greyson
It’s fall and my garden is dying. Being in NY for 6 days last week definitely put the wilt in full gear. I’m salvaging what’s left! Greyson’s new love is to play in the back of the garden, which he calls his “digging site.” It’s freakin’ adorable! He wore my wireless headphones today because he said it’s what construction workers wear. Then he pours water on his rubber ball in hopes that he’s helping it grow. I can’t with the cute factor! I made an AMAZING vegan pasta bake today that I will post tomorrow. When it was cooling off, G-dog and I hit up the garden for good times and some salvation. Sorry for the obscene amount of pictures, but what can I say? I used my most favorite subject today! For that, I kinda renege on my ‘sorry’. 😉
I would LOVE for people to post pics in my comment section of what their veggie gardens currently look like! I didn’t plant for fall. Regret city. I’ve got some garlic growing that I planted way too late and hoping it makes it all the way up before a wintery death. I wanted to plant it because garlic looks super cool when grown! You’ll see pics of it rising from the ground next to the fence.
Love my garden, love my lil’ guy, and had an incredible and incredibly warm/beautiful Oregon day today. Thankful to be outta the smog of Beijing and in the the clear skies of Portland. Come back tomorrow for my pasta bake post! Alright, it’s cocktail time. Until tomorrow!
PS- Any other bloggers use WordPress? If so, my color editing neeevvveerrr comes through on my pictures when posted on my blog – only filters work. Major disappointment! How can I fix this? Help puh-lease!!! -FGG
A Series of Poems on Motherhood
Dear Moms (and Dads),
Here is a snippet from my upcoming book, “One More Sip of Whine.” It is 5 different styles of poems – mostly humorous. #3 is my particular fave. I have no doubt that you can relate! Parenthood is the craziest hood you’ll ever roll through. My goal was to express that in 5 short poems. I’d love your opinions before the editing of the book is completed so please leave comments! Enjoy the read!
Some Mothering Poems to You, From Me
1- Roses Are Black
Roses are red, violets are blue,
Someone took over your life that was you.
Roses are red, violets are blue,
Your days are now filled with pee pee and poo.
Roses are black, violets are dead,
Deep down you must know you are out of your head.
2- A Haiku of Truth
Like thunder, their roar
Rain, your tears that start to pour
Scream, shriek, more, more, MORE!
3- A Tangled Slew of Rhyming Words
Shitting, pissing, screaming, unfit
Mommy shouting daddy “fuck it!”
Penis, ‘gina, keep your hands off!
Headaches, hormones, “need a wet cloth!”
Dolls that make shit tons of noise,
Oops! Mom broke those talking toys!
What the fuck was one and done?
I should’ve said “boy run or none!”
Thomas, Blippi, Tayo, Poli,
Oops! Mom ‘broke’ the fucking TV!
I want, I want, I want, MOMMY!
I give, I give, MY SANITY!
Hitter, biter, licker, kicker
Bruises, scratches, ice packs, LIQUOR!
Try to cook and then relax,
Mama needs her pills, XANAX!
Knock it over, pick it up!
Someone needs a bigger cup!
Tissues, boogers, burps, and farts,
Legos missing favorite parts,
Bath/story/bedtime blues,
Redundancy turns into booze,
I do not want green eggs and ham!
Shove it, be a fuckin’ man!
Brush your own teeth! Go to bed!
Where is my mind, I’ve lost my head…
4- A Cozy Couplet
Baby brewing in the womb
Sanity is leaving soon
5- Acrostic Poem for Dummies
Brainless act in Shanghai
Aspire for perfection – fail and sigh
Body shaming boobies – Buh-bye!
Your youth is gone – a new one – arise
*Found on Google images via PopSugar @ popsugar.com
5 Easy & Delicious Vegan Asian Inspired Meals
5 Easy & Delicious Vegan Asian Inspired Meals is a compilation of recipes from my blog that I totally love! Going vegan from veg-head a few months ago has been amazing for me. I have loads of energy (pumpin’ my B12’s of course) and a lot less belly bloat. I remember, many moons ago, this being the case when I was vegan for 2 years. Asian food is a fabulous foundation for vegans because there is rarely any dairy (Indian food aside and sans meat of course) involved. So many flavors and veggies to play around and experiment with. I often do ‘inspired’ meals. For example, my Mexican Sushi Rolls. I am definitely not a ‘by the book’ kind of gal. I like to mix it up and use whatever ingredients are in my fridge. When you read my recipes, I encourage you to take your own creative license with them as well.
Get some chopsticks out, prepare to make yourself a hot and saucy mess, get together with friends, chow down with the fam, drink well, chat well, eat well, and appreciate the amazing conversations and moments that come from the kitchen to the table. Life is short. A recent and heavy loss reminded me of this, and she lived a beautiful 93 years. I’ll always have our family meals… politics, humor, tales from the times etc. In many Asian cultures, food is a time to be together. Click on the light green title of the recipe below the pic for the link to the recipe, and serve up your own good times and traditions… let the memories begin!
RIP, grandma. You’re my woman amongst all women. I’ll carry you with me forever and always. XOXO
Chocolate Covered Fruit – Vegan!
So there’s no trick to making the easiest thing in the world. I thought I’d post my pics of my chocolate covered fruit because they were delicious and made me feel better about giving my kid sweets. I have this thing about sugar. Especially about giving sugar to my almost 3 year old. Outside of soda, I think it’s the worst thing in the world for your body. Anything in moderation? Sure! I’m not that crazy, but I don’t get down with loads of sugar for the soul. Have some soup. I am a savory girl, not a sweet girl. If you offered me a gigantic Belgian chocolate bar or an everything bagel, I’d choose the bagel every time. Nothing gets in the way of me and a good carb! Just ask my wardrobe that hangs so beautifully in my closet wondering when their owner will get her growing rear to the gym so that they may make an appearance in the outside world again. Sigh… winter is coming, I have loads of amazing pants but let’s just say they’re not lookin’ so fly. Of course, I write this as I am promoting a delicious dessert. 😉
My kiddo has been asking for donuts like crazy. Obviously, I’m not going to satisfy that hunger every time he begs, so I wanted to make him something different to get his mind out of the donut gutter. As you all know, I hate to waste food! I looked in my fridge and fruit bowl, and noticed I had a ton of good fruit about to go south. This is when the chocolate covered fruit lightbulb went on. The rest is delicious history. Start melting your sugars away…
- 1 vegan chocolate bar
- 1 handful of honey roasted peanuts - crushed
- 1/4 cup shredded coconut
- A variety of fruits - I used bananas, strawberries, blueberries, and 1 peach
- Melt your chocolate
- Dip fruits in chocolate and scatter coconut and peanuts on top
- Let cool for a few minutes
- Done!
- Sparkling Rose
- Red Zinfandel
- Port
Mexican Vegan Sushi Rolls!
Mexican Vegan Sushi Rolls! are so incredibly healthy, easy, and delicious. I wanted to do something unique with my nori rolls so I looked at what I had to get rid of in my fridge, and this idea rolled (hehe) right into my head. I had whipped up some fire roasted hot sauce last week with my various hot peppers that are pouring out of my garden. I smothered the inside (and out) with it. Of course, using store bought hot sauce will be just as amazing. From there, I added my sushi rice, and everything else from the recipe card below…
Everyone always assumes that I don’t eat sushi because I’m veg. Sushi is an awesome veggie or vegan food! You can put absolutely anything in it. The weirder the rolls, the better. At least in my humble opinion. 😉 Carrots, cucumbers, and avocado. That is primarily the “it” veggie sushi roll. Screw that! Shove some buffalo patties, chives, and pinto beans in there! Why not use tofu or tempeh? Go Italian style with some amazing Tofurky Sun-dried tomato/basil sausages and more. Go Greek with olives, tomato, and hummus, think of throwing some kind of veggie patty or a falafel in there! There’s no end to what you can roll into your nori. Obviously, swishing it down with some hot saki is highly recommended, or even encouraged. I live near a saki factory where you can go and taste the amazing flavors that sakis have to offer. Pretty dope! If I haven’t mentioned it before, I’m in love with living in Oregon again. Five years in China and I’m extra freakin’ in love with this orgasmic place! I get asked all the time why in the world I don’t live in New York (my home state), and I have one answer: The Pacific Northwest rocks!
Mexican Vegan Sushi Rolls! should be on your list of things to make this week. In addition to some cocktails, Halloween decorations, jack-o’-laterns, and costumes of course. 😉 Eat up and enjoy!
- 4 Nori wraps
- 3/4 C cooked sushi rice
- 1 vegan buffalo chicken patty (I use Boca) cut into strips
- 1 slice vegan cheese (I used Field Roast Chao - Tomato Cayenne) cut into strips
- A handful of chives cut in half
- 8 slices of cucumber
- 8 slices of carrot
- Optional: avocado slices (recommended) & cilantro to taste
- Pinto beans to taste (I dived 3/4 of a can)
- Hot sauce for inside and out - to taste
- Optional: Everything bagel seasoning for a garnish (I used Everything But The Bagel from Trader Joe's)
- Top each sushi roll with rice (split evenly among all 4 rolls)
- Add hot sauce on each roll (to your taste)
- Add beans
- Add cheese and buffalo patty
- Add carrots and cucumbers
- If using, add avocado and cilantro now
- Add chives
- Roll them up and lightly rub with water then sprinkle with everything seasoning
- Garnish with hot sauce
- Feel free to squeeze a fresh lime over those rolls!
- Hot saki OR Hefeweizen, Witbier, American Ales
Easy Whole Wheat Grain Bread
Easy Whole Wheat Grain Bread is delicious, healthy, and incredibly simple to make! It reminds you of why homemade bread is so superior to store bought loaves. Whole wheat flour, flax seeds, and oats are the foundation of this incredible bread. If I had sunflower seeds I would’ve thrown them in too, but hey, create with what you have and waste not! Are you sick of hearing me say that yet? 😉
When I was in Ireland I ate homemade ‘brown bread’ at my relative’s house daily. This bread recipe reminds of the brown bread I had when I was there. Prior to arriving my mom said 2 things to me: 1- You must accept tea when offered to you. 2- You must eat the brown bread when offered to you. So, I did! Boat loads and boat loads of it with my friend, Cheryl. Perhaps my mom could’ve offered me alternate advice about traveling through Europe with my 18 year old friend a week after we graduated high school, but perhaps she knew I wouldn’t have taken it. It was surreal to be away, so far away, and so free, for the first time in our lives. We had no idea what the hell we were doing, were supposed to be seeing, what we shouldn’t be doing… 😉 So, we did everything, and it was awesome.
This Easy Whole Wheat Grain Bread is crazy easy, delicious, and healthy. It wins across the board! Great with butter, hummus, or any spread, and excellent for sandwiches, too. Get down with the bread and #carbthe’bleep’up! (My favorite hashtag on Instagram) 😉
- 4 C whole wheat flour
- 1 1/2 cups warm water
- 1 packet fast-acting yeast
- 2 Tbl agave or honey (I use agave)
- 1-2 Tbl flaxseed (Pending upon what you prefer)
- 3 Tbl oats
- 1 tsp salt
- Put all ingredients into a large mixing bowl leaving 1/4 flour for later, and stir well
- When fully stirred, knead dough with hands
- Add flour until the dough doesn't stick to the bowl any longer
- Spray the bowl and cover dough with a cloth - let rise for 2 hours
- Next, let rise in fridge for an additional 2-3 hours
- Take bread out of the refrigerator and knead
- Spray a loaf pan and shape the dough inside the pan. Spray top of bread. Cover with plastic wrap and let sit for 30-40 minutes
- Bake bread for 30-35 minutes at 425f
- Done!
- Great with butter, hummus, or any spread! Excellent as a sandwich bread as well.
Creamy Vegan Macaroni and Cheese!
Creamy Vegan Macaroni and Cheese! is my most favorite comfort food. This is a mac n’ cheese recipe for vegans and non-vegans alike. It’s crazy creamy, flavorful, and (drum roll please)… healthy! Don’t let that scary word deter you. I promise you that this kinda health will only bring you happiness. In a mouth watering, drooling, gimme some more, can’t stop won’t stop, this is the food bomb of the year, melt in your mouth, orgasmic kinda shit, kinda way. I know, I’m setting the bar high, but this will deliver. My kiddo, when asked what he wants for dinner, at least 3 days of the week begs me for “vegan macaroni and cheese puhleeeasse, mom!” Even the meat eating, vegan sceptic hubby thinks it’s incredible. His vegan fearing mother is coming for a visit from Scotland soon and he’s asked me to unknowingly feed her loads of yummy vegan food and drop the “V” bomb on her after she’s scarfed it all up. Now, this just feels wrong, but hey, it just might still happen. However, he can drop that dirty lil’ “V” word, not me. Judge us if you will. 😉
Creamy Vegan Macaroni and Cheese! is the perfect lunch or dinner for all walks of life. I recommend saving some of the cheese sauce on the side so that if you actually have left overs the following day you can pour on some new sauce before reheating, otherwise it will be a bit dry like a ‘real’ mac n’ cheese. I used my fabulously beautiful and buttery crooked neck heirloom squash from my garden, however, you can use any yellow squash. That all being said, go get cookin’ into your carb coma! *IMPORTANT: Be sure you have someone to roll you from the table to the bed. This mac n’ cheese don’t mess around, aight? 😉
- 2 1/2- 3 yellow squashed - sliced
- 1 C vegetable broth
- 1/2 C nutritional yeast
- 2 tsp turmeric
- 2-3 Tbl flax seed (optional - but hey, so healthy, why not?!)
- 1 Tbl garlic powder
- 2 tsp onion powder
- 1/3- 1/2 C raw and unsalted cashews
- 1 lb pasta
- Salt to taste
- Preheat oven to 400f and then roast squash until soft (about 25 minutes)
- Meanwhile, boil your choice of pasta and set all other ingredients in a blender (I use my Vitamix)
- When squash is done, place in blender with other ingredients and blend until creamy and smooth
- Pour over pasta and done!
- You will have extra sauce for another round of pasta! Make 2 lbs for a party size. Also, save some sauce if you will have left overs the following day when reheating. It will be too dry without extra sauce when reheating like a 'real' mac n' cheese.
- Beer- American style brown ale
- White wine- Dry riesling
- Red wine- Grenache
Red Potato Salad With Hickory Bacon (Vegan)
Red Potato Salad With Hickory Bacon (Vegan) was created on a whim! I LOVE red potato salad in the summer. In fact, it could be a qualifier in whether or not we could be friends. Ah, how I so vainly quantify the important things in life! 😉 Hehe. As usual, I digress… I had purchased Sweet Earth Vegan Hickory & Sage Benevolent Bacon from Whole Foods because, well, it was on sale! I was staring into the depths of my refrigerator when I started throwing things onto the countertop. Okay, okay, so I miiight have been drinking some cocktails throughout the process but hey, more often than not, that lends itself to some seriously delicious kitchen concocting! After my potatoes were cooked, I mixed the bacon and other delicious ingredients (see pic below) together, and voila! A new red potato salad was born into instant stardom! The crowd went wild. I can still hear the applause! I know… Clearly, I’ve taken some creative license in the story telling department but cut me some slack. It’s my first week of school back with the little monsters and my brain is a big bowl of shriveled and exhausted matter. I should’ve posted this before Labor Day but hey, I was too busy relaxing! #sorrynotsorry.
Enjoy the Red Potato Salad With Hickory Bacon (Vegan) for your next BBQ or carb lovin’ affair! Lastly, I have finally caved and joined Instagram! New addiction in my life for sure. *Insert sigh here.* Follow me @ foodgalleygab. Chow!
- 2 lbs red potatoes - boiled and then diced
- 1/2-3/4 red onion - diced
- 1/4 C finely diced chives
- 4-5 slices of Sweet Earth Vegan Hickory & Sage Benevolent Bacon - diced
- 3 heaping Tbl dijon mustard
- 1 - 1 1/2 C Grapeseed Oil Veganaise (pending on your level of creaminess. Start with 1 cup, stir, and then see if you want more)
- 1/2 tsp - 1 tsp garlic powder (pending on your preferred level of strength)
- 1 tsp salt
- Pepper to taste
- Boil the potatoes for about 15 minutes
- Meanwhile, add the rest of the ingredients into a mixing bowl and stir well
- When potatoes are done, let cool, and then mix together in bowl
- Done!
Buffalo Cauliflower Bowl
Buffalo Cauliflower Bowl! Why did it take me so long to try this buffalo cauliflower trend?! It’s freakin’ delicious and amazing! Anything uber tasty and guilt free gets a 5-star rating in the book of “Heather.” 😉 Side note: This would be a frightening book. Resume: I was in Bend, OR 2 weeks ago for a vacation (amazing! Managed to squeeze in a night in Sisters and Crater Lake as well), and went to the Bend Brewery. It was there that I was first deflowered to the hot and steamy buffalo cauliflower. What a tasty and ravenous treat. Hehe. 😉 It was instant love. A saucy treat that ended in a very real addiction. Obviously, I had to keep coming back to buffalo cauliflower for more, because, like my love for General Hospital, #additionisreal. Hey, don’t judge, we all have our vice!
I read loads of recipes online about how to make this taste sensation. I was also trying to recreate the incredible recipe from the brewery. This Buffalo Cauliflower Bowl is a result of a few recipes leading me to my buffalo cauliflower of perfection. You will LOVE this as much as everyone I have shared it with. Pinky promise!
I wanted to add this delicious treat to a ‘bowl’. I’m all about the bowls since going more plant-based. It’s an amazing way to get tons of goodness and flavor in your life in an easy fashion. I smothered some sliced portobellos and potato wedges in this buffalo sauce and grilled them up. I put spinach on the side and then smothered the shrooms, fries, and spinach in my left over vegan mac n’ cheese sauce. *Recipe coming soon! I’ll hyperlink the italicized words once I post the recipe so you can dig into this delicious cheese sauce asap. Now, stop reading this and start making your soon-to-be most favorite hot and steamy dish of the summer! Summer flings are the best kinda flings. Only, she’ll leave you wanting more. Every season. Every day. Buffalo Cauliflower Bowl does not disappoint. Enjoy the addiction. 😉
- 1 medium head of cauliflower - diced into florets
- 1/2 of a medium sized potato - cut into wedges
- Approximately 5 sliced portobellos
- 1 large handful of raw baby spinach (or any other green)
- 1/2 C flour
- 1/2 C water
- 1/4 C vegan breadcrumbs (optional)
- 1/2 cup hot sauce - I prefer buffalo style (or more sauce if you like it fully smothered)
- 2 Tbl Earth Balance (vegan butter) - melted
- 1/2 tsp agave or honey (optional, but so good)
- 1/2 tsp salt
- 1/4 tsp black pepper (optional)
- 1 tsp garlic powder
- Preheat the oven to 450f.
- In large bowl, whisk together flour, water, bread crumbs, garlic powder, salt, and pepper
- Toss in cauliflower - toss well
- Spray tinfoil or cookie sheet and place in oven for 20 minutes
- Remove the cauliflower from oven - keep oven on
- In small bowl, mix hot sauce, agave, and Earth Balance
- Toss cauliflower in sauce and butter and place back in oven for 30 minutes
- About ten minutes before the cauliflower is done, mix and toss the potatoes and mushrooms in the same bowl that had the hot sauce - I add pepper too
- Spray them with oil and place them on the BBQ until done
- Assemble bowl and done! Use any dipping sauce/dressing you desire!
- I smother my fries, mushrooms, and spinach in my vegan mac n' cheese sauce!
- This makes one bowl with left over buffalo cauliflower
- A cold IPA or Pale Ale
Creamy Peanut Thai Noodles
Creamy Peanut Thai Noodles is my most favorite dish this summer. It’s right up there with my Crazy Creamy Pesto! I am a massive noodle lover, no doubt about that. Peanut noodles are always my fave and I have been perfecting this recipe forever! If ever there were a perfectly creamy and healthy noodle dish, this is it. Taking one for the win!
When I was living in China there was very little I could eat at Chinese restaurants. Din Tai Fung was my ultimate favorite place on the planet. One, because I could actually eat there. Two, because of their amazing dumplings, braised tofu, aaaand noodles! I have been on an epic quest to recreate those ‘noods’. In doing so, I concocted something I like even better! Score again! I make bucket loads of sauce and freeze the rest in small sized batches so that I can just take a meal-size out of the freezer when needed.
If you eat this and aren’t a sloppy hot mess, you’ve not enjoyed them properly. I wanna see sauce all over your pretty little face dripping down the noodles and your mouth. See G-man (below) doing just that. Hands and all! Now, go get your ‘noods’ on!
… getcha, getcha, getcha, getcha, getcha, your ‘noods’ on…
- 2 C raw and unsalted peanuts
- 1/2 C nutritional yeast
- 1 can (13.5 oz) coconut milk
- 3-4 Tbl Braggs Aminos or soy sauce
- 1 Tbl sesame oil
- 1 Tbl agave or honey
- 1 Tbl lime juice (optional)
- Sprinkling of salt if needed (I do not use)
- 2 tsp ginger powder
- Water for texture
- Noodles (asian-think ramen)
- Boil noodles
- Place all other ingredients in a strong blender/processor (I use my Vitamix) and blend
- Very slowly add water for a thinner (not too thin!) texture as you blend
- Pour amount needed over noodles and you're done!
- Freeze extra sauce
Vegetarian Chicken Street Tacos
Vegetarian Chicken Street Tacos was the last recipe I had made as a veg-head!* I was vegan many moons ago for two years and have decided that after watching “What the Health” and a few other documentaries about plant-based diets/veganism that I would return to the vegan world. Also, just my own want and desire to always return to my vegan ways. That being said, Vegetarian Chicken Street Tacos was an incredible creation that would be just as incredible with a vegan chx and sans queso fresco.
I am a massive lover of tacos, quesadillas, or anything that I can smother in hot sauce, cilantro, and avocado. Obviously, a margarita wouldn’t hurt the process if you decided to sweeten the deal. 😉 Everyone I know has been raving about street tacos for the past year. I guess I live under a rock because I had no freakin’ idea what the hell they were talking about. Hence the birth of this delicious lil’ taco recipe I have so kindly shared with you here. 😉 Invite some of your most favorite peeps over and chow down with some incredibly beautiful, delicious, yet healthy and easy (bonus for sure) food, and blend up some tasty margs. You’ll be a taco making star amongst your nearest and dearest. If you’re not convinced, serve them more margaritas. 😉 Taco time!
*Veg-head: (Top definition in Urban Dictionary)
- Quorn Fajita Chicken
- 5 street taco tortillas (4.5") - corn or flour
- 1 zucchini- diced finely
- 1 avocado- diced
- 1/2 can of pinto beans (seasoned or unseasoned)
- 5 mushrooms -diced finely
- 1/2 lime or the equivalent in lime juice
- Fresh cilantro to taste
- Taco seasoning to taste
- Queso fresco- enough to be sprinkled on each taco. Approximately 4-5 Tbl
- Hot sauce to taste
- Toss the pintos beans, taco seasoning, lime juice, zucchini, and mushrooms in a bowl and mix
- Cook in pan with chicken for about 5 minutes (medium-medium high)
- Lay out tortillas and divide the mix evenly on top of each tortilla
- Garnish with cilantro, queso fresco, avocado, and hot sauce
- Fold in half and done!
- Your choice of margarita
- OR
- Beer (pale ale or IPA)
Crazy Creamy Pesto (Vegan)!
Crazy Creamy Pesto (Vegan)! is my new summertime spread. I use it on virtually everything I eat! My garden is overflowing with basil plants so I’m pumpin’ out pesto like it’s going outta style. I’ve been adding all sorts of things to my pesto: arugula, spinach, kale, cashews etc. My girl friends and I went camping recently and one of the ladies had made a pesto pasta salad using an edible lemon essential oil and it was amazing! If you get your hands on some of that tastiness I urge you to throw it into your pesto for a superbly refreshing summertime sauce.
The one thing I remember my father making plenty of every summer was pesto. Every time I’d pop over there for a meal we’d be eating it in some form or another. I, too, am a lover of pesto everything. This summer I’ve been making loads of rotini and farfalle with my Crazy Creamy Pesto (Vegan)! sauce. However, I rub that creamy green goddess sauce on sandbos, wraps, as a dip for veggies (peppers overflowing outta my garden), as a pizza sauce (both myself and G man’s most favorite thing to make together), or with any grain imaginable tossed up with some salad goodies. I think the gist is that you really can’t go wrong with pesto… ever.
Basil, spinach, kale, walnuts (’cause who can afford pine nuts these days?!), cashews (for extra creaminess), lemon, garlic, salt, and voila! Sub any of those salad greens for arugula or another healthy green. Add olive oil or any other oil for a different texture. As always, adapt and create to your tastebuds and whatever it is you have left over in your fridge or garden. Happy summertime eats to you all!
- Large handful of basil leaves (approximately 15-20 large leaves)
- 3/4 cup raw and unsalted cashews
- 1 cup raw and unsalted walnuts
- 1 cup raw spinach leaves
- 1 cup raw kale
- 1-2 Tbl lemon juice
- 2 cloves garlic
- salt to taste
- olive oil/water for texture (as per your preference). I add a small bit of water to thin it out during blending and mix in a smidge of olive oil once in bowl.
- Put all ingredients into a blender (minus oil) except water and blend
- Slowly add water according to your desired consistency and blend again
- Sub out spinach or kale for arugula, or add less of the first two and use all three together!
- Add tomatoes, sun-dried tomatoes, or sauteed mushrooms to liven up a pesto pasta!
- Sauvignon Blanc or Arneis
Banana Carrot Coconut Breakfast Muffins
Banana Carrot Coconut Breakfast Muffins are delicious, easy, and vegan! Looking for a healthy and easy way to start your day? Take a quick muffin to go! Now, at the end of mixing together all of these ingredients, I opted to make them vegetarian instead because I discovered some left over chocolate chips from Easter. However, typically, I would keep them vegan just to make them extra healthy! Of course, something this delicious can easily be scarfed down as a dessert. They are specifically stated as breakfast muffins because they are not light and fluffy, but rather dense and filling like a good breakfast should be.
I have no idea what’s happened to me with age, well, that’s not entirely true at all. A big.fat.sigh. to that on many accounts, however, regarding breakfast, what used to be my most favorite meal of the day, I no longer have an appetite in the early hours of the day and I struggle to get down anything too large. Being that I fully understand and support the importance of a dope bfast I force myself to eat something. These Banana Carrot Coconut Breakfast Muffins are perfect for me right now because they’re quick to eat, healthy, dense enough, but doesn’t leave me feeling like I’ve just eaten a mountain of food. Not to mention, getting both the wee dude and myself ready in the morn leaves little time to chow down on gigantic homemade delicatessens. I make a tray of these bad boys and I’m good for the week! If not, freeze them and enjoy their deliciousness at a later date. On that note, happy easy, healthy, vegan, and delicious morning to you! Love, Foodgalleygab.
- 2 C oats
- 2 bananas
- 1 C shredded carrot
- 2/3 C shredded coconut
- 1/2 C whole wheat flour
- 3 Tbl flax seeds
- 1 tsp salt
- 1 heaping Tbl cinnamon
- 1/4 tsp ginger
- 1/2 C water
- 1 C unsweetened almond milk
- 2 Tbl agave (substitute honey if you'd like)
- 2 Tbl vegetable oil
- Optional: chocolate chips
- muffin pan (12 muffins)
- blender
- Preheat the oven to 375F
- Place all ingredients in a blender (I used my Vitamix) and blend until smooth (if using chocolate chips, don't blend them in. Put them in after blending and stir them into the mix well)
- Spray your muffin pan and fill each muffin to the top rim
- Bake for approximately 25-30 minutes
- Let cool and then enjoy!
The BEST Vegan Nacho Cheese Sauce Ever!
The BEST Vegan Nacho Cheese Sauce Ever! is the creamiest, tastiest, and easiest vegan cheese sauce I have created to date. It is also the best tasting vegan nacho cheese I have ever consumed! After years of messin’ around and trying to create the best vegan nacho cheese sauce one can possibly make, I dare say, I have finally done it. The texture is absolutely incredible and the flavor is outta this world. Okay, so I’m not gonna be humble in this post ’cause this kicks some serious vegan nacho cheese ass! My husband greatly dislikes and will not eat almost every single ingredient in this sauce, but absolutely LOVED this cheese sauce. If you knew my husband, you’d know that this is sayin’ something. I have a million and five ways you could alter this for different styles as well. Typically, I say, “use whatever is in your fridge and use my recipe as a guide,” however, in this case, to achieve flavor and texture I would state that you should follow this recipe as closely as possible. If you’d like to have a different style of vegan nacho cheese sauce I’d recommend the following:
Add vegan chorizo! Trader Joes makes a bomb one!
Add even more jalapenos!
Add cilantro (had I had this in my fridge I absolutely would’ve done this)
Add taco seasoning for a flare
Jazz it up with a smoky (or any) hot sauce
Vegan or not, this is a much healthier version of a cheese sauce and it literally takes a mere 5 minutes to make. If I sold my, “The BEST Vegan Nacho Cheese Sauce Ever!” I would promise you a money back guarantee if you were not 100% satisfied. Get down with some corn tortillas chips, sweet peppers, and margaritas on your next beautiful weekend!
- 1 C raw cashews
- 1/4 C nutritional yeast
- 1 1/4 tsp Braggs Liquid Aminos OR soy sauce
- 1 Tbl vegan cream cheese
- 1 Tbl dijon mustard
- Approximately 10 pickled jalapenos
- 2 Tbl Ortega Taco Sauce (or another thick taco sauce)
- 2 small cloves of garlic
- 1/4 tsp onion powder
- 1/4 tsp cumin
- 1/4 tsp coriander
- Place all of the ingredients in a mini food processor or anything that will chop/grind well and puree until completely smooth and creamy
- Serve with your choice of chips or veggies
- I served this at room temperature. If you refrigerate and serve again you can quickly heat it up.
- Feel free to add: vegan chorizo, more jalapenos, cilantro, and/or taco seasoning
- Negra Modelo or another light and crisp beer
- OR
- A margarita of your choice
Xanax & Xylophones/Husbands & Headaches
Xanax & Xylophones/Husbands & Headaches is a post from my up and coming book, “One More Sip of Whine.” It is a humorous tale of my experience in motherhood thus far. Crude, raw, honest, crass, foul mouthed in nature sums up this book. It will be released this summer on Amazon Kindle. Enjoy the chapter and keep a look out for the release! I will post on my blog when that date has arrived. Let me know your thoughts in the comments. Thanks!
Xanax & Xylophones/Husbands & Headaches
NOISE. HEADACHE. CHILD. HUSBAND. Noise. Headache. Child. Husband… and the cycle continues. It’s Groundhog’s day here at the Rugile/Burns household but I’m not getting paid Murray style moola for this gig. Through my long and winding road that I’ve travelled, where did I fail to turn towards the path of enlightenment? Maybe I should consider embracing Buddhism. I do love those bald and fat bellied statues, especially in my garden. Also, I think I could really get down with meditation, or at least the music, especially when coupled with a sweet massage. Lastly, I freakin’ love Thailand and any excuse to go back there is a good one.
I am sure I’ll mention this many times; I am a music teacher. Colleagues come into my classroom regularly and ask me how I cope with all of the incredible noise. To which I retort, “what noise? Oh, that? I’ve stopped hearing those sounds years ago.” I say this coupled with a ‘pish-posh-like’ flick of the hair and slight ‘tude. I don’t hear the children, their instruments, their exuberant yelps, dog like whines, cat clawing arguments etc. It’s not that I don’t give a crap, I have simply learned to block them out. I could never do this job if I heard every last itty bitty freakin’ bang, crash, or curse. I’d go “bleepin’” mental. However, when I am home, I hear everything. I hear lil’ G’s adorable laughter and Thomas’ (my husband) silly toddler voices and then… screech! The sound of a record going tits up and my ears and brain begin to bleed. Once the bleeding starts, it’s almost impossible to stop. In fact, I sometimes begin hemorrhaging. And then, once again, all of the mother shamers swim up, thirsty, ready to chew me to shreds. They can smell me from a million miles away. “There she goes again, ruining her child… again…” However, I should really say, “There she goes again, ruining her children… again…” Remember, I, too, am a wife, which means, I have a ‘huschild’. It goes a lil’ somethin’ like this: The banging of the metal xylophone (the loudest instrument on earth- thanks Gymboree), throw in the tambourine (Thomas’ go-to and most favorite musical toy- ‘bleep’ me), screaming, add some ‘singing’; “Danny Boy,” with some interesting lyrics and about 5 different key changes in one phrase, kill my musical ears now, Sky news (Thomas is Scottish) blaring from the television in the background, the sound of my somewhat broken drier banging harder than a whore and her pimp on a headboard, and then, right when my brain is about to spontaneously combust, someone decides now is a really great time to throw in the lovely timbre of the recorder, but not before shot-putting a couple of drum sticks in my general direction. I love my life, I love my life, I love my life, I think I can, I think I can, I think I can… Mommy needs a Xanax, ‘children’.
Now, every time, okay, almost every time I see/hear my munchkin doing/saying something that is fairly questionable I ask myself this, “What would Xanax Heather do?” and, voila! I have my answer!
Heather: “Sh**, should he be standing on the countertop that close to the edge?”
Xanax Heather: “‘Bleep’ it! He’s allllll gooood.!”
So, I go with the latter.
Heather: “Two pancakes. Greyson, mommy said only two pancakes!”
Xanax Heather: “‘Bleep’ it! Have three. No, ‘bleep’ that, have ten!” … “Let them eat cake! Let them alllll eat cake! Mwahahahahahahahaaaaaa!”
So, again, I go with the latter. Once adopting this new and glorious frame of mind, this adorable and insane new philosophy, I find myself breathing easier and needing “one less sip of whine.” Catch my drift? Good.
*A cleaned up version of a chapter in my upcoming book, “One More Sip of Whine,” which will be published on Amazon Kindle this summer. Tales of motherhood told through a raw, crude, foul mouthed, and humorous lens.
*Image from Dreamstime
https://www.dreamstime.com/stock-illustration-overwhelmed-mother-woman-messy-room-illustration-background-image53592840
-Written by,
Heather Rugile
