Food Galley Gab

A Series of Poems on Motherhood

Dear Moms (and Dads),

Here is a snippet from my upcoming book, “One More Sip of Whine.” It is 5 different styles of poems – mostly humorous. #3 is my particular fave. I have no doubt that you can relate! Parenthood is the craziest hood you’ll ever roll through. My goal was to express that in 5 short poems. I’d love your opinions before the editing of the book is completed so please leave comments! Enjoy the read!

Some Mothering Poems to You, From Me

 

 1- Roses Are Black

 

Roses are red, violets are blue,

Someone took over your life that was you.

Roses are red, violets are blue,

Your days are now filled with pee pee and poo.

Roses are black, violets are dead,

Deep down you must know you are out of your head.

 

 2- A Haiku of Truth

 

Like thunder, their roar

Rain, your tears that start to pour

Scream, shriek, more, more, MORE!

 

3- A Tangled Slew of Rhyming Words

 

Shitting, pissing, screaming, unfit

Mommy shouting daddy “fuck it!”

Penis, ‘gina, keep your hands off!

Headaches, hormones, “need a wet cloth!”

Dolls that make shit tons of noise,

Oops! Mom broke those talking toys!

What the fuck was one and done?

I should’ve said “boy run or none!”

Thomas, Blippi, Tayo, Poli,

Oops!  Mom ‘broke’ the fucking TV!

I want, I want, I want, MOMMY!

I give, I give, MY SANITY!

Hitter, biter, licker, kicker

Bruises, scratches, ice packs, LIQUOR!

Try to cook and then relax,

Mama needs her pills, XANAX!

Knock it over, pick it up!

Someone needs a bigger cup!

Tissues, boogers, burps, and farts,

Legos missing favorite parts,

Bath/story/bedtime blues,

Redundancy turns into booze,

I do not want green eggs and ham!

Shove it, be a fuckin’ man!

Brush your own teeth! Go to bed!

Where is my mind, I’ve lost my head…

 

4- A Cozy Couplet

 

Baby brewing in the womb

Sanity is leaving soon

 

5- Acrostic Poem for Dummies

 

Brainless act in Shanghai

Aspire for perfection – fail and sigh

Body shaming boobies – Buh-bye!

Your youth is gone – a new one – arise

*Found on Google images via PopSugar @ popsugar.com

*Found on Google images via PopSugar @ popsugar.com